a story in progress

I am writing this post out of an influx of emotions. I am throwing out whatever ounce of rationale or some self made up rule of not turning this space into an emo space. I just had two mid terms and the last paper was just plain bad. But above the horrible outcome of the papers, I am feeling so mad at myself. Mad about not preparing earlier. Mad about falling asleep in class all the time. Mad about not prioritizing my studies enough.

These maddening thoughts that have been spinning around my head for the past hour are now acting like some triggering points to all these insecurities that I am having about myself. From my priorities in life to what I think I need. Everything seems to be a far shot. A one in a million shot.

Underachieving and uncertainties.

I hate them.